Be Prepared for Resistance

Be Prepared for Resistance

20 Ways to Change Your Story

16. Be Prepared for Resistance

It’s funny what can happen when you start to change a story. When you set an intention and start moving in a new direction, right away you will run into resistance from inside and out.

The boundaries of your old stories and habits can act kind of like an elastic band. At first, the stretch is easy. The farther you stretch, the stronger the resistance grows.

That resistance may come from your inner critic (you suck at this), inner perfectionist (if you’re going to do this, it must be brilliantly flawless), or inner child (I’m scared to do this). Often it’s a super-size-me value-pack combination of all of these inner parts, plus a side of lazy bones and a big serving of why-did-I-want-to-do-this-anyway for dessert.

You need only imagine that elastic band of resistance is around your waistline to start to feel the pinch after a meal like that.

There is also an inner map master and keeper of the status quo, aka the ego, who gets more than a bit freaked out when you start to enter uncharted territory. Remember the ancient mariner’s maps? Beyond the known waters and land masses, the mapmakers would write “thar be dragons” as a warning to fools who might try to sail past known boundaries. And beyond the dragons? Well, that’s where you fall right off the edge of the earth.

This is exactly how your ego feels about your new intentions. Change is the end of the world as ego knows it. You take a few steps and the dragon alarm gets tripped. Ego goes into red-alert mode and those boundaries you just stretched come snapping back at you.

Besides this formidable inner push back, it may seem like the outer world has it in for your new intentions as well. Suddenly, that time you set aside to work on your new goal gets filled with unexpected demands. The boss needs you to work overtime, a family member gets sick and needs your help, your car breaks down, or an unexpected opportunity that feels more important than your goal presents itself. It’s like a volley of rubber bands being shot in your direction. Your new intention dies the death of a thousand stinging snaps.

What’s a story-changer to do?

Might as well just give up on that sexy little black dress of a new story and schlep back into your nice comfy pair of current story yoga pants, right?

No. Don’t. Please don’t.

Here’s a powerful process that can take the sting out of your resistance: Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) also known as tapping.

It is a process of tapping on various acupressure points while focusing on a limiting belief, fear or block and slowly introducing reframing and replacement statements. It can be done under the direction of a trained facilitator or you can learn to do it yourself.

By tapping on the meridian points, old stories can be released from our energy system and replaced with new and more empowering beliefs.

The official website for EFT promises that “limiting beliefs can vanish, personal performance can soar, relationships can thrive, and vibrant physical health can be yours.”

If that sounds like a bunch of new age mumbo jumbo and just too good to be true, please consider that the Veterans Administration recently approved EFT as an effective treatment for PTSD.

If you want to learn how to use EFT, the official EFT site is filled with information, examples and resources. Or you can search for the term EFT on the web and find a practitioner near you. For now, take a look at these videos demonstrating the use of EFT to counter resistance. You’ve got nothing to lose but your old stories.

~~~~~

This is the 17th post in a 21-post series sparked by Chapter 9 of Fallen, The Adventures of a Deep Water Leaf, in which Lizard suggests that Alora change her story.

#20WaysIn20Days, #ChangeYourStory, #Fallen

Choose Your Own Adventure and Be Flexible

href='https://www.123rf.com/profile_halfpoint'>halfpoint / 123RF Stock Photo

20 Ways to Change Your Story

15. Choose Your Own Adventure and Be Flexible

 

Copyright: halfpoint / 123RF Stock PhotoMy daughter used to love those Choose Your Own Adventure books when she was little.

Every few pages, the protagonist faces a choice point and the reader gets to choose what the protagonist does next. That choice sends the story off in one of several possible directions, by sending the reader to a specific next page. After a few more pages, a new choice point is reached, and the reader again shapes the direction the story will take by choosing for the protagonist.

Each book has multiple possible endings, at least some of which may be reached through multiple paths. The ending you reach depends on the choices you make along the way.

What a brilliant story structure and clever mirror of the way life works!

Here’s how I think it relates to the idea of story changing.

On page one, you, the protagonist, decide to change your story. You set a new intention or goal, or decide to change something about yourself or your beliefs. You take a few steps in a new direction.

Then on page four, life throws something unexpected at you and you’re faced with choices. Some choices will take you deeper into your new story, and some will keep you locked in the old story. You don’t always know which choice is the best one, but you make a choice and you keep on moving.

The key is to keep your focus on the WHAT (the desired ending) while remaining super flexible about the HOW (which pages of the book will get you there).

Copyright: halfpoint / 123RF Stock PhotoIf you get locked into which specific pages you need to land on to get to the ending you want, you might miss meeting a great supportive character or enjoying an exciting subplot.

If you can stay flexible about how the pages of the story unfold, while making resourceful choices along the way, you can enjoy the journey of choosing your own adventure and reach your happily ever after.

~~~~~

This is the 16th post in a 21-post series sparked by Chapter 9 of Fallen, The Adventures of a Deep Water Leaf, in which Lizard suggests that Alora change her story.

#20WaysIn20Days, #ChangeYourStory, #Fallen

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