20 Ways to Change Your Story
16. Be Prepared for Resistance
It’s funny what can happen when you start to change a story. When you set an intention and start moving in a new direction, right away you will run into resistance from inside and out.
The boundaries of your old stories and habits can act kind of like an elastic band. At first, the stretch is easy. The farther you stretch, the stronger the resistance grows.
That resistance may come from your inner critic (you suck at this), inner perfectionist (if you’re going to do this, it must be brilliantly flawless), or inner child (I’m scared to do this). Often it’s a super-size-me value-pack combination of all of these inner parts, plus a side of lazy bones and a big serving of why-did-I-want-to-do-this-anyway for dessert.
You need only imagine that elastic band of resistance is around your waistline to start to feel the pinch after a meal like that.
There is also an inner map master and keeper of the status quo, aka the ego, who gets more than a bit freaked out when you start to enter uncharted territory. Remember the ancient mariner’s maps? Beyond the known waters and land masses, the mapmakers would write “thar be dragons” as a warning to fools who might try to sail past known boundaries. And beyond the dragons? Well, that’s where you fall right off the edge of the earth.
This is exactly how your ego feels about your new intentions. Change is the end of the world as ego knows it. You take a few steps and the dragon alarm gets tripped. Ego goes into red-alert mode and those boundaries you just stretched come snapping back at you.
Besides this formidable inner push back, it may seem like the outer world has it in for your new intentions as well. Suddenly, that time you set aside to work on your new goal gets filled with unexpected demands. The boss needs you to work overtime, a family member gets sick and needs your help, your car breaks down, or an unexpected opportunity that feels more important than your goal presents itself. It’s like a volley of rubber bands being shot in your direction. Your new intention dies the death of a thousand stinging snaps.
What’s a story-changer to do?
Might as well just give up on that sexy little black dress of a new story and schlep back into your nice comfy pair of current story yoga pants, right?
No. Don’t. Please don’t.
Here’s a powerful process that can take the sting out of your resistance: Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) also known as tapping.
It is a process of tapping on various acupressure points while focusing on a limiting belief, fear or block and slowly introducing reframing and replacement statements. It can be done under the direction of a trained facilitator or you can learn to do it yourself.
By tapping on the meridian points, old stories can be released from our energy system and replaced with new and more empowering beliefs.
The official website for EFT promises that “limiting beliefs can vanish, personal performance can soar, relationships can thrive, and vibrant physical health can be yours.”
If that sounds like a bunch of new age mumbo jumbo and just too good to be true, please consider that the Veterans Administration recently approved EFT as an effective treatment for PTSD.
If you want to learn how to use EFT, the official EFT site is filled with information, examples and resources. Or you can search for the term EFT on the web and find a practitioner near you. For now, take a look at these videos demonstrating the use of EFT to counter resistance. You’ve got nothing to lose but your old stories.
This is the 17th post in a 21-post series sparked by Chapter 9 of Fallen, The Adventures of a Deep Water Leaf, in which Lizard suggests that Alora change her story.
#20WaysIn20Days, #ChangeYourStory, #Fallen